“You look back. You look back because that is where the answers lie. You look back to understand the present. From your vantage point the present is unstable, a confusing clamor of competing voices. It is only by casting your mind back to an earlier time, a time when the plans were being drawn up, that the present regains its stability. The earlier time was a simpler time. It was a time of blueprints. As you look back, you begin to see these blueprints emerge. You realize what the initial intentions were.” -Tom Rath
I had a plan. I had a plan but things did not go the way I expected. I fell in love with one thing and out of love with another. I forgot the reason I loved the second in the first place.
I lost my balance.
As if he’d known I was waiting, the boy rode up on his white horse. However, he did not carry me away. He asked me to learn how to ride. I could not accept.
And so the queen and her servants took me to court and asked me to dance. I had danced splendidly as a young girl, but as I tried to remember the steps, I moved out of sync and the court became displeased.
Once again the boy pulled me aside to show me his steed. He told me there were secrets to uncovering the souls of animals. He shared with me a few, but he would not tell me all.
And so I yelled at the boy. I told him he did not understand. I told him my heart was breaking, and I wanted it to stop. I told him if he would carry me away on his horse, I could start a new life. The new land would welcome me and all would be as it was before I forgot how to dance.
And still he refused. He told me we could ride together, but I would have to be the guide. He told me not to be afraid anymore. He said I already had all the answers I needed.
It was then that I realized what love meant.